The tall person reminded me today that I have not mentioned Mr. ‘Crazy’ Parrot for a while. He was concerned that people might think that I had managed to find a way to open his cage and return him to the wild or that he had drowned in my drool. Well, I am ‘happy’ to report that Mr. ‘Crazy’ Parrot is indeed alive and well.
I know what some of you are thinking – that picture could have been taken months ago. Okay, to prevent any conspiracy theories emerging I asked the tall person if we could take a picture of Mr. ‘Crazy’ Parrot with today’s newspaper. He didn’t have one so we took a picture of Mr. ‘Crazy’ Parrot with the tall person’s cell phone, which has today’s date on it.
But then we thought that anyone with technical knowledge reading this would know that it’s possible to put any date on a cell phone. Hmm, what to do?
The tall person suggested that we find an event on the news that was so unique to today that everyone would know that the picture was taken on 9 November proving that Mr. ‘Crazy’ Parrot is alive and well.
We surfed the BBC website on the tall person’s cell phone and found what we were looking for – a unique event – ‘Giant asteroid passes near Earth’.
An event like this doesn’t happen every day so a picture of the news report taken next to Mr. ‘Crazy’ Parrot is conclusive proof that it was taken today and he is alive and well.
The tall person said that my efforts to reassure everyone that Mr. ‘Crazy’ Parrot is alive reminds him of the famous Monty Python’s Dead Parrot Sketch.
Mr. Praline: ‘E’s not pinin’! ‘E’s passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! ‘E’s expired and gone to meet ‘is maker! ‘E’s a stiff! Bereft of life, ‘e rests in peace! If you hadn’t nailed ‘im to the perch ‘e’d be pushing up the daisies! ‘Is metabolic processes are now ‘istory! ‘E’s off the twig! ‘E’s kicked the bucket, ‘e’s shuffled off ‘is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!
Hmm, very funny tall person.